blank stares at blank pages

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Got postcards from my former selves, saying, "How you been?"
We might've said good byes just a little soon,
Robbing lips, kissing banks under this moon.

"if you're a bird, i'm a bird" (tagboard here)

Thursday, October 13, 2005 @ 10:22 pm

went to watch goal yesterday wif regina. haha. she's spastic. i was telling her to shout goal! everytime the team scored a goal. and she really did it la! haha. very funny. the show was alright. the actor's very cute! they should let more of these good-looking actors act in major films. haha. some parts were rather heartwarming, some parts were rather heartwrenching. lyk the part where the father stole his son (the lead, santiago munez)'s money to buy a truck for his own business. santiago has been saving up to get a ticket to go to london. a scout saw him playing soccer at some park. ya. dat part was sad. and the part where his grandma called to inform him dat his father had passed away from heart attack. dat part was sad too. and his grandma's very very nice! she gav him money for dat ticket to london cos he lost all his money to his father. and she had to sell off her possessions to get all dat money. i really admire the kind of relationship santiago has with his grandma.

suddenly i miss my grandpa. he was a great person. my mother told me he set up his own shop all by himself. and before that, he didnt hav anything to his name. he started from scratch and worked very very hard to set up his own heavy industry shop kindof thing. i remember he would stuff his fingers into his fist and ask us how many fingers there were inside. and he would giv us many many coins. i remember going home every saturday feeling richer cos of the coins he gav us. but he passed away a few yrs back from throat cancer or something lyk dat. it was really scary. the adults were all sitting around the table and didnt let us stay there to listen to wad they were saying. i was stil young then. around pri4 or 5 and i didnt really know wad was going on. the atmosphere was all tense and they didnt let us watch tv either. it was only a few weeks later dat i found out that my grandpa was gone. i dont even remember seeing him for the last time.

okay okay. all that feels very heavy.

i couldnt sleep yesterday night! dont know why. and i kept yawning in the morning. my eyes were very very teary.

very worried about my math. what mr teoh said today made me want to cry. i dont know la. just hope dat i'll be able to pass e math so i dun hav to drop a math. but if i dont drop a math, i dont know if i'll be able to cope next yr. on the other hand, if i were to drop it, it'll be more difficult to enter jc? but then again, i dont even know if i wanna go jc or poly or wad. i also dunno la.

Thursday, October 13, 2005 @ 10:22 pm

went to watch goal yesterday wif regina. haha. she's spastic. i was telling her to shout goal! everytime the team scored a goal. and she really did it la! haha. very funny. the show was alright. the actor's very cute! they should let more of these good-looking actors act in major films. haha. some parts were rather heartwarming, some parts were rather heartwrenching. lyk the part where the father stole his son (the lead, santiago munez)'s money to buy a truck for his own business. santiago has been saving up to get a ticket to go to london. a scout saw him playing soccer at some park. ya. dat part was sad. and the part where his grandma called to inform him dat his father had passed away from heart attack. dat part was sad too. and his grandma's very very nice! she gav him money for dat ticket to london cos he lost all his money to his father. and she had to sell off her possessions to get all dat money. i really admire the kind of relationship santiago has with his grandma.

suddenly i miss my grandpa. he was a great person. my mother told me he set up his own shop all by himself. and before that, he didnt hav anything to his name. he started from scratch and worked very very hard to set up his own heavy industry shop kindof thing. i remember he would stuff his fingers into his fist and ask us how many fingers there were inside. and he would giv us many many coins. i remember going home every saturday feeling richer cos of the coins he gav us. but he passed away a few yrs back from throat cancer or something lyk dat. it was really scary. the adults were all sitting around the table and didnt let us stay there to listen to wad they were saying. i was stil young then. around pri4 or 5 and i didnt really know wad was going on. the atmosphere was all tense and they didnt let us watch tv either. it was only a few weeks later dat i found out that my grandpa was gone. i dont even remember seeing him for the last time.

okay okay. all that feels very heavy.

i couldnt sleep yesterday night! dont know why. and i kept yawning in the morning. my eyes were very very teary.

very worried about my math. what mr teoh said today made me want to cry. i dont know la. just hope dat i'll be able to pass e math so i dun hav to drop a math. but if i dont drop a math, i dont know if i'll be able to cope next yr. on the other hand, if i were to drop it, it'll be more difficult to enter jc? but then again, i dont even know if i wanna go jc or poly or wad. i also dunno la.