"have I told you about the tension of opposites?" morrie says.
"the tension of opposites?"
"life is a series of pulls back and forth. you want to do one thing, but you are bound to do something else. something hurts you, yet you know it shouldnt. you take certain things for granted, even when you know you should never take anything for granted."
"a tension of opposites, like a pull on a rubber band. and most of us live somewhere in the middle."
"sounds like a wrestling match", i say.
"a wrestling match." he laughs. "yes, you could describe life that way.
"so which side wins?" i ask.
"which side wins?"
he smiles at me, the crinkled eye, the crooked teeth.
"love wins. love always wins."
*
"so many people walk around with a meaningless life. they seem half asleep, even when they are busy doing things they think are important. this is because they're chasing the wrong things. the way you get meaning into your life is to devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community around you, and devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning."
*
"you see," he says to the girl, "you closed your eyes. that was the difference. sometimes you cannot believe what you see, you have to believe what you feel. and if you are ever going to have other people trust you, you must feel that you can trust them, too- even when you are in the dark. even when you are falling."
*
"the truth is, when our mothers held us, rocked us, stroked our heads- none of us ever got enough of that. we all yearn in some way to return to those days when we were completely taken care of- unconditional love, unconditional attention. most of us didn't get enough."
*
"wherever i went in my life, i met people wanting to gobble up something new. gobble up a new car. gobble up a new piece of property. gobble up the latest toy. and then they wanted to tell you about it.
"guess what i got? guess what i got?"
"you know how i always interpreted that?"
these were people so hungry for love that they were accepting substitutes. they were embracing material things and expecting sort of a hug back. but it never works. you can't substitute material things for love or for gentleness or for tenderness or for a sense of comradeship.
"money is not a substitute for tenderness, and power is not a substitute for tenderness. i can tell you, as i'm sitting here dying, when you most need it, neither money nor power will give you the feelings you are looking for, no matter how much of them you have."
*
"part of the problem, mitch, is that everyone is in such a hurry", morrie said. "people havent found meaning in their lives, so they're running all the time looking for it. they think the next car, the next house, the next job. then they find those things are empty, too, and they keep running."
once you start running it's hard to slow yourself down.
*
"the most important thing in life is how to give out love and how to let it come in. we think we don't deserve love, we think if we let it in we'll become too soft. but a wise man named levine said it right. he said 'love is the only rational act.'"
*
sacrifice... we all make them. but you were angry over yours. you kept thinking about what you lost. sacrifice is part of life. it's supposed to be. it's not something to regret. it's something to aspire to. little sacrifices. big sacrifices. a mother works so her son can go to school. a daughter moves home to take care of her sick father. sometimes when you sacrifice something precious, you're not really losing it. you're just passing it on to someone else.
*
lost love is still love, eddie. it takes a different form, that's all. you can't see their smile or bring them food or tousle their hair or move them around a dance floor. but when those senses weaken, another heightens. memory. memory becomes your partner. you nuture it. you hold it. you dance with it.
*
life has to end. love doesnt.
*
"that each affects the other and the other affects the next, and the world is full of stories, but the stories are all one."
*
Friday, May 05, 2006 @ 11:17 pm